Grant Hackett denies being the cause of AirAsia shaking

HACKETT DENIES HAVING ENOUGH QUAD STRENGTH TO SHAKE AN ENTIRE PLANE

HACKETT DENIES HAVING ENOUGH QUAD STRENGTH TO SHAKE AN ENTIRE PLANE

Former Australian swimmer Grant Hackett has denied being the source of the violent shaking that took place on an AirAsia flight yesterday.

“Honestly, it wasn’t me, those accusations are completely false,” Hackett told news reporters this morning.

“I’ll admit that I was on that flight and I did have the guy seated in front of me in a vice-like grip with my legs but the shaking I gave him had nothing to do with the shaking the plane was enduring.”

The airline has accepted Hackett’s version of events, however, the passenger the former Olympian had an altercation with is yet to regain consciousness and provide his version of events.

In further news, aeronautical engineers investigating the cause of the shaking have been left puzzled after finding nothing wrong with the aircraft’s engines.

THE FAULT REPORT IS A SATIRICAL WEBSITE AND ITS CONTENTS ARE NOT INTENDED TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY. ANY RESEMBLANCE TO REALITY IS PURELY (AND LAMENTABLY) COINCIDENTAL.

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